Kindness Matters!

Kindness Matters!

What is it going to take to start conducting our lives as an extension of this simple and life-changing truth?

1) What do I mean by the above statement? How can you apply this quote to your life?

2) How does this statement about Tactics Without Strategy!  change the very way that you engage in life?

(Please sit with this for a while. Surrender to the energy evoked by the statement and resist looking for the answers. Please do not post a theoretical spiritual response)

How does this quote apply to your every
day living experience? Please resist the urge to entertain theories
about this quote – what is the direct experience of what I am inviting
you to explore!



22 Responses to “Kindness Matters!”

  1. on 21 Jul 2018 at 4:56 am ceejaypea

    I can see how kindness can be a challenge if one fears performing an act of selflessness or of being taken advantage of. When I have such fears I try to distinguish their source and avoid seeing others as my problem and try to heal the fear within. Namaste.

  2. on 20 Jul 2018 at 5:38 pm Keshav Howe

    Acts of kindness that are born out of clear and and undivided presence benefit all, by honoring the mutually interdependent nature of Self and reality.  It is always wise to check if there are any underlying motives at play, before any action is taken.

  3. on 19 Jul 2018 at 6:47 am Diane

    Keshav: from this Wood's perspective I have learned that I need to ask myself if I am performing an act of kindness that I may be resisting is from the perspective of "I should" do this, and/or if I am seeking "approval". This is the barometer I must use as I must still be "kind" to myself by being true to my needs. It can be challenging at times, because the "judge" and "victim" are in a dual oftentimes.

  4. on 18 Jul 2018 at 8:17 pm Lori

    Kindness matters. It is the stone that makes ripples in the water. Here are the ripples I witnessed at a medical rehab hospital when I went to see my niece this week. As I walked in, I heard the beautiful sounds of the piano. I asked the man playing if he would stay so my niece could hear his music. My niece Kelly played, even composing music for the piano before she was she became paralyzed. The man agreed. Kindness. I needed to find and ask the staff if they could quickly put Kelly in her chair. They did. Kindness. I brought her to listen to the music. Kindness. She leaned back and closed her eyes. Music reaches past the brain damage. She is present and peaceful. Others stop to listen as the man plays song after song. He says he has comes in twice a week for over a year but has never had people stop and listen. Kindness. As he finishes the next song, my niece works to touch her stiff fingers together to clap. She has never done that. She mouths the words "Thank you". We all smile. Kindness matters

  5. on 17 Jul 2018 at 3:47 pm Keshav Howe

    Thank you Diane and Donna for a "Wood’s Perspective" on Kindness. Hum…

  6. on 17 Jul 2018 at 5:37 am Diane

    Wow Donna. Spoken with such openness and integrity! I share in your experience. For me I have to learn how to say NO without guilt when faced with a very needy friend . Compassion is there however sometimes the willingness to act just isn’t there. It is something I work on all the time . I love ❤️ your post. Jealousy criticism and anger as well as compassion and patience are the work I need to heal in me in this lifetime! Love Diane

  7. on 16 Jul 2018 at 2:10 pm Donna

    Being kind sounds so easy but that has not been my experience. Although it has felt more natural over the years to be kind, I have had to work at it. I was too stuck in jealousy, competition and judgment for kindness to have had a space in my reality. Midway through life I came to recognize that I was low on the compassion meter and this was something I wanted to change. And that pull to change needed to govern my choices if it was to actually take place. For what is compassion if not a higher vibration of kindness?

    So I’ve noticed the same thing regarding kindness. It begins with a choice, a choice to remain aware and present of, well, everything. It requires desire, diligence and devotion. For me, that takes practice, lots and lots of practice. I get impatient and intolerant. Judgment comes in and old patterns of what should and should not be happening take over. I catch it. It happens again. I catch it again. I catch it and if necessary take action. Apologize when I feel I have not been compassionate or kind. Smile at strangers, offer a compliment, give the right of way, a dollar or a box of crackers.

    Putting myself in the shoes of others helps me to keep my heart open. Kindness does indeed matter because it affects matters. It neutralizes and shifts energy and changes lives, communities and the world. We’re all doing the best we can all the time. Period. I'll keep practicing.

  8. on 16 Jul 2018 at 7:17 am ceejaypea

    One of my clients, who has suffered a severe depression for 50 years, visited a friend in Hospice this past weekend. This friend often brought her half of her dinner (knowing that my client rarely cooked), often stopped by to chat, often asked if my client needed anything at the store when she went out shopping. All in all a very kind and caring individual. The day after my client visited her she passed. I feared my client's depression would worsen, however, although she was tearful and quiet she recognized the beauty of the relationship they had had, and she was grateful for having been able to see her to say goodbye. I was struck by how my client's friend had moved her by her simple and sincere kindness – just reaching out to another. Also I was impressed by how my client could bear a loss such as this by stepping outside of herself and valuing the relationship they'd had. Namaste.

  9. on 22 Jun 2018 at 6:47 am ceejaypea

    Kindness is contagious. Something as simple as letting someone behind me check out first makes the people behind and to the left and right more generous, kind and smiling. One act of kindness helps others recognize their true selves, be more open and accepting, and awake. It’s a natural extension of of the true self and thus part of daily life. Namaste.

  10. on 18 Jun 2018 at 9:19 am Diane

    Being kind to myself is simply not becoming a victim to the petty tyrants that show up in my life, whether they are outside forces in form, or inside forces of doubt. I will meet them head on / or rather heart on and be kind to see that simple misunderstandings happen – but are not permanent, AND most important “they don’t define me”, “they simply ‘inform’ me”.

  11. on 11 Jun 2018 at 10:45 am Betty

    Carol: As someone who has participated in prolonging the agony of a bad marriage by sharing my story with others, I know the truth is that those stories are the most damaging to ourselves, continuing to self-inflict the pain of the perceived injustices. And then, I can go one step further and know that that self is not even who I am. Ahh, freedom.

  12. on 11 Jun 2018 at 7:40 am ceejaypea

    After my divorce I often used examples of the heinous things my ex had ‘done to me’ in discussions about something or someone else. My ex had long since moved away and so it was unlikely that anyone would know him. How convenient for me. I eventually came to see that and to see that I was totally leaving out my contribution to the deterioration of our marriage. As I owned my part he became less the example and I began to speak of how I had changed, what I had let go of, what I no longer did. This changed many stories, my behavior and my speech, and in addition to celebrating owning my own garbage, it was a great kindness to others not to drag them into gossip, especially from the safety of an unknown being as the object of our stored up anger. Namaste.

  13. on 11 Jun 2018 at 3:50 am missy

    Be kind to the whole world around us and it returns kindness 100 fold and it’s so much fun to be alive! Recently I’ve been helping switch out some art with a local group next to where I work and it’s suppose to be fun and pleasant right? Well life happens , folks were late getting older work down so new could go up and one petty tyrant was really rude and was stuck in their tyrant-ness and after the fact I’ve had to apologize for her -no fun. Talk about a sweet pot turning sour in seconds. I see it attract others to tell their tails of woe – like glue to blame the world. Hey, we all have bad days it doesn’t mean we have to drag everything around us down with the verbal details. Change the story as you say Keshav and Smile, it helps open the heart. Peace , Namaste

  14. on 10 Jun 2018 at 9:14 pm Betty

    I am not able to respond to that, Keshav. I just know that my heart soars when I go on a discussion site and people are calling for the need to be kinder to those in need. Myself and others are calling for tolerance of those that on the outside seem different from us but who are really just the same as us, really are us. And knowing that there are so many who believe we are all in this together and must help each other and that we truly care about what happens to others. We are listening to people's dilemmas and we are supporting them with our words. We are saying we hear you. It is not lip service. We are in this for the long run. And we will do what we can to change what we can in order to help you. This collective intent is palpable and undeniably powerful.

  15. on 10 Jun 2018 at 5:33 pm Keshav Howe

    For me, an outward expression of kindness has to start with a commitment to no longer identify with highly disruptive "self talk." And, the more intolerant "I am" to that inner petty tyrant, the more I find myself to be intolerant of the collective expressions of such discordant behavior – particularly with petty tyrants such as Donald Trump. It does not matter how we got here, or how to assign blame. It is up to "us" to deal with it.
    What does this have to do with Kindness?!

  16. on 10 Jun 2018 at 8:16 am Betty

    Kindness proceeds from awareness. There “I” am love and love is all I have to give. I have been taught to be kind by my mother, my teachers, and by the example of others. But the truest kindness is not given from a place of separation. It doesn’t involve a me giving to a you. That sort of kindness is”doing the right thing” kindness. Or looking for a payback from kindness, no matter how subtle that motivation may be. And if we were all that sort of kind the world would be a better place.

    True kindness isn’t something we do. It is what we are. It happens without a thought. It just is. We all know how to say a kind word, or to do a kind deed. We all know when we have failed to be kind because our separate self was focused on what our separate self needed or wanted.

    It’s not a question of right or wrong or good or bad. But presence is where true kindness arises from, it cannot be limited to a you or a me. Because in presence we are all one. What affects a “part” affects the whole. If I do something to you in order to benefit me, if I have hurt you, I have hurt myself. And I will know this once I look at it from the perspective of presence.

    I am not sure what people mean when they refer to having kindness for themselves or having faith in themselves. But I suspect that self is a self that is in separation. It is a self that needs shoring up. The true self that we all are does not require anything from us. As Keshav would say nothing needs to be added. Who we are doesn’t require self-esteem, our own kindness or anything else. True kindness dwells in the home of the true self, presence.

  17. on 08 Jun 2018 at 9:59 pm Sarah Whitney

    I think committing to kindness is recognizing that our undivided presence always has an impact on one another, and choosing for the impact to be intentionally good. If I get caught up in myself and don’t think about how my actions impact people around me, it usually has a negative or neutral impact. I think this is the first part of kindness- recognizing what you are already are contributing to a situation.

    Consciously choosing to process my inner battles so my family and friends don’t feel my stressors is definitely a practice I’m working to improve. But once I get out of being mired in myself everything feels easier. The second part of kindness feels like connection. Kindness feels like compassionate connection. It’s seeing beyond my experience and sharing happiness in action or compassionate presence. Definitely worth working towards!

  18. on 08 Jun 2018 at 4:29 pm Keshav Howe

    If we are not willing and able to tend to, and maintain, a clean and clear room, how can we "expect" the rest of the house to clean itself.

  19. on 08 Jun 2018 at 9:13 am sasanijjs

    . From my experience only attachments to thought based reactions and labels create a false sense of separation which breeds judgment. Through the eyes of stillness kindness seems to be the only option. The choice is quite clear.

  20. on 08 Jun 2018 at 7:11 am ceejaypea

    Kindness softens the world. Namaste.

  21. on 08 Jun 2018 at 7:08 am ceejaypea

    As all others and myself are one and the same, I agree DD. Be kind to all, especially those who suffer the most, and those who have the least, and those whose hearts are blind, and those whose hearts are full . . . the powerful and the meek, those we love and those we see as enemies . . . I could go on, but you get the idea. Namaste.

  22. on 07 Jun 2018 at 10:08 am Diane

    I can start by first being kind to myself.

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